Daddy's Boy

Having children is the most fantastic experience I have ever had. Today I would like to talk about my oldest. Stephen is 28 so this will be testing the old brain cells.

I was a weird kid. Ever since I could remember, I wanted to grow up get married and have kids. I loved kids. While the other guys were talking about having sex just to have sex, I was talking about how great it would be to get married and have kids. As you can see that dose not mix well. I was made fun of all the time.

I must of asked every girl that said she would be my girlfriend if we can get married and have kids. Yes even the grade school crushes. (I told you I was a weird kid).

I met Karen Whitlock my freshman year at Tennyson High School in Hayward, California. She was a sophomore. We did not hit it off well that year. She had her group she hung out with and I had mine. My sophomore year her junior year she went to another school and I lost touch with her. My junior year her senior year we met up again at Holiday Bowl in Hayward, California. She worked in the nursery, my mother worked the front desk, my brother Loni worked as the janitor. Karen had a huge crush on my brother. I feel she still dose to this day. Anyway, My brother told me about this girl who kept bothering him. So, being the nosy type I thought I would go to the bowling alley to find out who it was. I do not know what changed but when I saw her again the fireworks flew. In my mind she was pretty, funny, and engaging. I do not know how I worked up the courage to ask her out. But we started to date. My memory is that we fell in love almost right away. Yep, you guessed it I wanted to marry her and start having kids. Months went by. At this time her parents lived in Manteca, California and she lived with her grandmother it turned out right across the street from me. One day we took a greyhound bus to see her folks. On the way back I pulled out my pocket calender (Yes, I was a nerd too.) I pointed to a date that escapes me right now and said to her "plan the wedding for this date" she of course said "don't you need to ask me first?" So I did. She refused to answer me for a couple of days. She finally did with yes. I knew this was the one. I knew I would marry her.

We found out shortly after that she was pregnant. I was so excited. One catch... we were not married yet. Karen and I wanted to call her parents and of course my mother would not hear that. She said we owe her parents the respect to tell them in person. So we drove up. When we got there her family was so happy to see us. I was so nervous I could barely sit still. Her little brother Terry who was I think 9 at the time and I played it was fun. Then her dad came home from work. Now I was terrified. After dinner we started watching TV. I do not know if it was by chance or that it was just normal but every program, every commercial was about babies. Most of the programs were of kids getting pregnant before they were married. Karen and I would look at each other with wide eyes. I kept thinking to myself we have to tell them. Before we knew it her brothers went to bed, her parents then went to bed and we were left there alone watching yet another program about babies. We said we have to tell her parents soon. Without warning Karen got up off the couch and said come on, she started walking to her parents bedroom. I was like now? she said yea we have to tell them tonight. It was at that moment I remembered that her dad had a pistol under his bed. I think I stammered and tried to get Karen to wait but she was determent to tell her parents which was the right thing to do. She knocked on the door and went in and without skipping a beat she said "Well we thought we would tell you I am pregnant" My knees buckled, I waited for the worst but it did not come. Her dad looked at us both and said " you guys are 18 and 19 you are adults why tell us?" We said something about trying to show them respect. Her dad said "what are you going to do now?" I said that I had planned on joining the Air Force and we planned on getting married. Her dad was so awesome, He said "I do not want you to marry my daughter just because she is pregnant. It will never work out and it will be hard on the children if you do not do it for the right reasons." I assured him I loved his daughter and wanted to marry her anyway.

I do not know how long we were there but we excused ourselves and left the room. We were drained. Karen went into her room and I went into the room that they always had for me. About 5 minutes later I hear the door to her parents room open and I heard footsteps. I thought this is it, I am dead now. Karen's father came into my room after he had grabbed Karen and said to follow him. He said "You have already slept together, do not insult me by sleeping in separate room now!" He took us into the living room and pulled out the sofa bed and ordered us to sleep there. It was a looooonnnnng night. I could hear Karen's mother crying it seemed like all night long. Karen and I could not sleep, we were so excited about being pregnant.

We were married and I joined the Air Force. I was in Tech School and Karen was over due so they thought If I would come home for a visit she would relax and go into labor. I came home and spent a couple of days with her and her family. I had to get back to training so I left disappointed that I could not be there when she went into labor. I flew back to Colorado to finish school. 1 June 1981 I came home from school to my dorm and found a note to call the red cross. After giving them my information they said "We are excited to inform you that your wife had a baby boy. All is well. Congratulations." I do not remember hanging up the phone. I was so excited I started screaming in the hallway. Now as you know we are trained to keep our military bearing at ALL times. I was ordered to the commanders office for this infraction. I could not stop smiling tho. The commander looked at me and started to tell me the importance of keeping military bearing and how I was disturbing everybody. He then looked at me as he leaned across the desk and say what was all the fuss about? I told him I had just found out my wife had a baby boy and that I am now a father and how it had always been my dream to be a daddy. He smiled the biggest smile I have ever seen and said "So that is why? well I can forgive you this one time." He pulled out a $20.00 bill and handed it to me and said "Go to the Arman's Club and buy a drink on me." With that he tore up the letter of reprimand and stood up and shook my hand. After saluting him, I was leaving his office, he shouted out "ROOT! I expect a leave request on my desk within 24 hours so you can see your son" I said yes sir and off to the phones I went to call everyone.

1 June 1981 Stephen Darryl Root was born in French Camp, California. I was able to fly home a couple of days later.

The whole trip from Colorado to California I could not wait to get home. It seemed like it took forever to get home. To this day I do not believe I kissed my ex wife when I walked in the door, I do not believe I said hello to anybody. I just kept saying where is he? They all laughed at me and told me to sit on the couch. Karen went to the bed room and a couple of seconds later she walked out with my son. She layed Stephen in my arms and told him that his daddy was holding him. I think I cried like a baby. Writing this I have tears running down my face of that precious memory. Now, I have held new borns long before this but this was my own. I did not want to break him. He was tiny and so cute. I caressed his tiny head, I played with his fingers and toes. I must have kissed him a zillion times in those first few seconds. All time had stopped at that very moment. I remember staring at him, amazed that I had helped to bring forth this new life into the world. Then panic hit me. What if I do not measure up as a dad? I do not know how to work on cars, I do not do sports at all well. Oh no, I made a huge mistake he will never like me. Karen must of sensed this as she leaned down and kissed me on top of my head and said you will be a good father. Soon it was time to give Stephen a bath. I sprung off the couch and begged to let me do it. There is a picture of me in my Air Force blues giving Stephen a bath. What the camera did not capture is that when I took off his teeny tiny diaper Stephen peed all over me. We all had a good laugh over that one. Karen's mom said well you have been christened a daddy now. I did not want to put him down. But it he was tired and needed to go to his crib. I must of went into the room a million times. Soon my family came and I had to share Stephen with everyone. when they left of course it was back to the crib so he can get his sleep. When he woke up I was right there. I fed him, I burped him, I changed his diaper. Karen's two brothers would hold him too. One day my ex mother in law noticed I had not picked him up. She said "are you OK? you have not picked up your son." I hung my head and said "Well he has been picked up and held so much today that I did not want to make him sick." She laughed so hard tears rolled down her cheek. She said "Darryl, he is not a puppy, you are so sweet for thinking that way, but pick your son up!" With that I ran to the room and picked him up. I did not put him down unless I was forced to either give him to someone else or had to put him down for a nap. Now that I look back on that I realize the days flew by and it was time to go back to Colorado to finish my training which would be another month. I cried the whole trip back. I must of told everyone on the flight that I had a son. I was so proud.

It was not long before Karen, Stephen and myself were reunited at Ellsworth Air Force Base, South Dakota. That is another story that will have to be told later.

Stephen is now 28 years old is married to his beautiful wife Jessica and has two children of his own. Aaron 7 and Gracie 2. I am so proud of Stephen. Stephen joined the Marines and went to Iraq and fought in the war. Stephen has seen so much sorrow while he was there. Even with all the horror he witnessed he still is a nice young man. Stephen and his family live in South Carolina. I miss them so much.

I love you so much Stephen!